Thursday, February 26, 2009

All Alone

So I've been thinking a lot lately about days of yore. When I had a lot of really little babies running around my house.

I always felt that there was no one else in exactly the same situation that I was in.

And I also felt that I would never be done with the picking up toys, wiping noses (and other places), kissing bumps, and the regular chaos that comes from children.

I hated running errands because I hated buckling 2 or 3 carseats, over and over again. And I was so exhausted when I came home from the "don't touch!" "come back!" "stop hitting!" "stop whining!" (actually this part never really ends).
We never went out on dates. We just put the kids to bed early and hung out.
We never really slept either, because there was always somebody up at night or crawling into bed with us.

I think the only way I made it through those times was my once a week play group (that I always started wherever I moved to) and my friends.

It was just so nice to visit with other moms and find out that I wasn't really alone in dealing with all these things; or even if I was, I could have other people laugh with me about it.

Everyone used to say to me that it goes by so fast and I'll regret it when its gone. When I was in the middle of it, I didn't want to hear about how I'd miss it someday. Yeah right. It never felt very fast to me.

Now all of a sudden I'm a somewhat older mom who seems to have it together. And now that its almost gone, I still don't really miss it.

I can run errands alone.

I have almost two built-in babysitters.

I mostly sleep at night (except when I can't fall asleep because I'm worrying).

Cleaning doesn't take as long as it used to because I have help, most can wipe stuff alone, and although the chaos is louder, its funnier, too.

There are still things to worry about; they're just not as physical. There's a lot more mental work going on. Its not easier or harder than it used to be; just different and bigger.

And guess what, I still go to play group and listen to how other people deal with these issues or at least laugh with the other moms about all of it.

But I feel for all the moms out there who are where I used to be. All I can say is that you are not alone!

Monday, February 16, 2009

Chaos Managed

So I just felt the need today to organize something; to get some part of my life in order.
I have been sick for the last two weeks and things are almost falling apart. (luckily I'm married to a lifesaver!)

So as I looked around at the stacks of dishes, piles of laundry, unvacuumed floor, scattered toys, miles of papers, etc. I decided to . . .

. . . plan and organize my garden.

I picked out what I'm going to grow and where I will plant it. I even drew a picture of what it would look like.
It just made me feel so much better.

When my lifesaver (see above) asked why the need to do that, I realized I just needed to be able to have some of my chaos managed without really putting any effort into it.

And you know what, it worked.

Later I did attack the dishes and laundry.
I even made bread.

So for me, I guess, just writing stuff down and feeling organized in one area helps me get started on the rest of the stuff.

At least I can hope so!