I always felt that there was no one else in exactly the same situation that I was in.
And I also felt that I would never be done with the picking up toys, wiping noses (and other places), kissing bumps, and the regular chaos that comes from children.
I hated running errands because I hated buckling 2 or 3 carseats, over and over again. And I was so exhausted when I came home from the "don't touch!" "come back!" "stop hitting!" "stop whining!" (actually this part never really ends).
We never went out on dates. We just put the kids to bed early and hung out.
We never really slept either, because there was always somebody up at night or crawling into bed with us.
I think the only way I made it through those times was my once a week play group (that I always started wherever I moved to) and my friends.
It was just so nice to visit with other moms and find out that I wasn't really alone in dealing with all these things; or even if I was, I could have other people laugh with me about it.
Everyone used to say to me that it goes by so fast and I'll regret it when its gone. When I was in the middle of it, I didn't want to hear about how I'd miss it someday. Yeah right. It never felt very fast to me.
Now all of a sudden I'm a somewhat older mom who seems to have it together. And now that its almost gone, I still don't really miss it.
I can run errands alone.
I have almost two built-in babysitters.
I mostly sleep at night (except when I can't fall asleep because I'm worrying).
Cleaning doesn't take as long as it used to because I have help, most can wipe stuff alone, and although the chaos is louder, its funnier, too.
There are still things to worry about; they're just not as physical. There's a lot more mental work going on. Its not easier or harder than it used to be; just different and bigger.
And guess what, I still go to play group and listen to how other people deal with these issues or at least laugh with the other moms about all of it.
But I feel for all the moms out there who are where I used to be. All I can say is that you are not alone!
I think the only way I made it through those times was my once a week play group (that I always started wherever I moved to) and my friends.
It was just so nice to visit with other moms and find out that I wasn't really alone in dealing with all these things; or even if I was, I could have other people laugh with me about it.
Everyone used to say to me that it goes by so fast and I'll regret it when its gone. When I was in the middle of it, I didn't want to hear about how I'd miss it someday. Yeah right. It never felt very fast to me.
Now all of a sudden I'm a somewhat older mom who seems to have it together. And now that its almost gone, I still don't really miss it.
I can run errands alone.
I have almost two built-in babysitters.
I mostly sleep at night (except when I can't fall asleep because I'm worrying).
Cleaning doesn't take as long as it used to because I have help, most can wipe stuff alone, and although the chaos is louder, its funnier, too.
There are still things to worry about; they're just not as physical. There's a lot more mental work going on. Its not easier or harder than it used to be; just different and bigger.
And guess what, I still go to play group and listen to how other people deal with these issues or at least laugh with the other moms about all of it.
But I feel for all the moms out there who are where I used to be. All I can say is that you are not alone!
Welcome back?
ReplyDeleteYeah, glad I could give you a few good laughs at playgroup this week! :) Serious, you've been through 6 kids - I don't think I would miss all that stuff either...yet. :) You're amazing! I hear ya on the put em down early to hang out and can't wait for the "most can wipe stuff alone!" Mine is way down the road! :)
ReplyDeleteand yet it still seems that kensie was a newborn just yesterday. my girlfriend told me when james was born. the moments will feel like years and the years like moments.
ReplyDeleteI am slowly getting out of that stage, but I have a few years left! When they are all in school full time it will be so nice! I hear all the time that I'll miss it! The only thing I really miss is the baby stages, and that sure doesn't last long at all! I am having such a tough time with Ben and trying to pick my battles. I take advice and learn to deal with all the buckling the kids 5 times a day and telling them to stop fighting, stop making a mess, but in the end I have to realize that they are learning, and I have to be patient, teach them and love them. Even if I want to squeeze them!!!
ReplyDeleteI can relate!
ReplyDeleteJan Bishop