Amulet

n: An ornament or small piece of jewelry thought to give protection against evil, danger, or disease.

I have one.

It mostly just sits around on the desk in my bedroom.

But there are some nights when I've been having a bad day. I'm just tired, worn out, frustrated over life.

And I'll see it there and put it on and it seems that for a moment all is right with the world.

Now I don't believe in "magical" objects. But I do believe in power.

Especially the power the mind has over the body.

It's become a bit of a joke for me to sit down at the desk, start complaining, see it there, put it on, and say, " oh yeah, now everything is going to be ok. This is just what I needed."

I am superwoman when I wear it. All is right in the world.

I feel like I have to be careful not to wear it all the time or it may lose its power over me.

I wear it just long enough to get that "I can do this now!" feeling.


Why do I feel so good when I put it on?


My amulet came from a race I did this summer.

I worked really hard training for that race.

But when the race was over, it was somewhat of a letdown. There was no immediate runners high for me. It was just over.

But each time I put on that medal amulet, I guess a small part of me remembers what a hard thing it was that I did.

And if I did that, then I can do anything, right?

Its powerful.

And its all in my head.

But that's where I really need the most power.

Because even though I'm not running long distances all day long, I am raising children.

And dealing with teenagers and the emotional issues that sometimes come with that.

And trying to keep a house clean.

And trying to improve myself a little each day.

So, its nice to have a little something that I can look at or wear to remind me of what I am capable of.

(And to laugh at myself as well.)


The mind is a powerful thing.

Being Nice

I really like being nice.

I try to be nice to everyone.

But, sometimes I whine about having to do something nice for someone.

So, the question that I've been asking myself lately is:


"Am I only nice when its convenient for me?"


It shouldn't be.

So, I'm working on it.

Because I don't like whining.

And I like to be nice.

Zookeeper

I am a zookeeper.

And I don't just mean that my house is a zoo.

Or looks like one.

Or smells like one. (I still remember my cousin's daughter looking into our car after a road trip and saying, "it smells like animals!")

I'm talking about my parenting style.

Have you heard about this book Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother by Amy Chua?

It's basically an explanation of a Chinese parenting method which produces successful tiger children.

Well, the other day on facebook a friend posted a link called Against Tiger Mothers.

It's the opposite view of the parenting method. He advances the idea of coyote parenting.

The idea being that tigers are the "specialists" and that coyotes are the "generalists" in our world.

I like both ideas.

Some of the children I raise will be tigers.

And some of them are definitely coyotes.

But, at least one of them might be a koala.

Sometimes it takes a while to see what animal they are.

That's my job as the zookeeper.

Figuring out what animal my child is and then following the appropriate "raising" technique.

Being a zookeeper is definitely not easy.

There are so many different kinds of animals.

In fact, in my zoo there are no two animals of the same kind.

But that's what makes a zoo great; the variety.


(And the variety is what makes it so loud, and messy, and smelly!)

Summer

You know those summers when you were a kid.

The ones that seemed to last forever.

Staying out late at night to play games.

Hanging out with friends.

Doing family things together.

Everyday is an adventure.


I'm having that kind of summer.

Work = Joy

Making friends is hard work.

And it gets harder the older I get.

It seemed so easy when I was younger.

It just happened.

I had great friends in high school and college.

Then life moved on.

Even as a young mom it was easy to make friends because what else was there to do except hang out with each other and talk about our "experiences".

I've always envied those women who have lived in the same place for a long time.

I imagine it would be easier to transition from that young mom time to busy life and still keep your friends.

Whenever I've moved its been harder to make friends with people my age.

And its not because people are not nice.

It's just that life is so much busier with older and more kids.

It really takes an effort to put myself out there and make friends.

Its just easier to deal with my own life and be alone.

But women friends are necessary for my growth.

So making friends, as uncomfortable as it is at first, is worth it to me.

Every time I have moved somewhere and put myself out there I have found other women willing to do the same.

It just takes some work.

But the pay-off for me is huge.

Yesterday I went on a hiking adventure with 3 other women and their families.

I think the kids had fun.

But, mostly for me, it was about making new friends.

Friendship, like anything else that takes work, brings me joy.