Truth

" And by the power of the Holy Ghost ye may know the truth of all things."  Moroni 10:5

"What experiences have you had when the spirit has shown you truth?"

This was the question I asked during our family's morning scripture study.

The answer that came to my mind surprised me.

Earlier that morning, during my personal prayer time, I felt an overwhelming sense of gratitude for the family I grew up in.

I have fantastic siblings. 

And two incredible parents that raised me in the gospel and taught me so much by example.

We definitely all have "issues" and don't get along perfectly.

But, each of my brothers and sisters is remarkable and has lived through unique and amazing experiences. 

I have learned so much from them and continue to be blessed by their examples.

As I had these feelings of gratitude and amazement, I realized that the Holy Ghost was showing me the truth of "these things".

The surprise wasn't that I love my family.

It was that I had always thought being shown truth was just about figuring out right vs wrong, or good vs bad.

But that morning, I learned that truth can be known through expressing gratitude!

God is so good.

Light Shiners

Today's "Light the World" prompt was to dedicate a star on your tree to someone who was a light in your life this year.

These people, right here.

(and yes, I need to get a new family picture - maybe when everyone is home in 2023?)

Hyrum is my homeschool/errand/hiking buddy. He has such a grateful heart and a creative mind.

Cassie brings so much joy and laughter to my life. She has so much enthusiasm.

Ginny is such an example of endurance and seeking and being brave.

My missionary boys are bringing light to others in England right now, but still filling my life.

Maggie is a light and joy with her humor, loyalty and dedication not to mention her fabulous gift-giving talent.

Kensie and Adam are stalwart and amazing as they finish college and get ready to welcome my first grandchild.

Tom just gets me and comforts me and helps me remember who I am.

I know that my life would be dark without them.

And even though I've listed all these great qualities they have, they main reason they bring me light is because I see them following The Light of the World, Jesus Christ.

I am blessed.

Cinnamon Rolls & Gratitude

I have an amazing cinnamon roll recipe given to me by my mom.

They are a favorite in our home and neighborhood.

But, I don't think anyone loves my cinnamon rolls as much as my oldest son.

He brags about them to all of his friends and is always so appreciative whenever I make them.

The other day, I made them for our first day of school "bus stop breakfast".

It was the first time I have made them since my son left on his mission.

I became pretty emotional thinking about him missing out.

But, even more, I realized how much I loved making cinnamon rolls for him.

I knew how much he loved them because he told me all the time.

Then I thought that this must be how my Heavenly Father feels when I show gratitude to Him for blessings He gives me.

It must bring Him so much joy to bless me with what He wants to give me.

I hope He knows how much I love Him and appreciate all of my wonderful blessings.

And I want all of my friends to know about Him, too!

Family Scripture Study

Oops, looks like I skipped over our family scripture study.

The thing is, I am definitely not an expert in this.

We have tried LOTS of different ways to do this.

For sure, morning time works best for us.

By night time, my mom hat/patience is almost gone.

I just want everyone to go to bed.

And I am a believer in letting kids sleep as long as possible.

So, I put off doing early morning scriptures for a long time.

Notice I said "kids" in the previous sentence.

Teenagers are not kids!

When I had kids start high school, we started doing scripture study at 6:30am.

We do that all during the school year.

And then I've always struggled where to fit scripture study in during the summer.

I usually get up and exercise and go to work for a short time and the kids sleep until I get home around 8:30.

Though there have been some summers when I still woke the kids up at 6:30 so my husband could join us.

Ha! There was some rebellion.

Now, that there is not a school schedule to adjust to, I decided to do the 8:30 time.

But, I wake the kids up 30 minutes before for breakfast and getting ready.

Our scripture study goes much better when they are awake.

That being said, what does it really mean that scripture study goes better?

We go back and forth between taking turns reading out loud in chronological order and trying to have kids read before and then having a discussion.

Having the Come Follow Me program has helped us a lot.

I'd love to say that every scripture study is spiritually fulfilling.

But the truth is, I probably only feel the spirit during scripture study hopefully once a week; maybe less.

To me, the important part of scripture study is developing the habit.

I want my kids to know its important to me to make it a priority.

And maybe when they are older, they will remember the importance and make it a habit in their own families.

Quiet Time

I want to talk about Quiet Time.

This is not to be confused with my Mom Time.

(and it is so important to me, that I'm skipping over exercise time to talk about it!)

When I was just starting out on this parenting journey, I was lucky enough to have an older sister with kids older than mine.

She was a gold mine of information.

But, the number one nugget she gave me was the idea of "Quiet Time".

Every day, there is a time set apart for it.

The rule is, it must be spent in your room and you can't come out until the time is over.

When I first started this, we did only a 15 minute quiet time.

And there was some crying and door holding to get it to happen.

They could do what they wanted in quiet time as long as they cleaned up afterwards.

At the beginning, it would usually turn in to nap time.

As they got used to the idea, we gradually increased the time.

And as more kids came along, there was less quiet and more messy  creative play.

It became 30-60 minutes of my day that I looked forward to having some down time.

Life saver!!


We'd gone away from quiet times in our home.

My kids are older and not around that much anyway.

That is until now.

We are home together all the time.

And Quiet Time is back!


My kids complained a lot at first.

"We have to do an hour and a half of quiet time every day!!??!!"

"What are we supposed to do for that long??!!!"

Guess what?

It's saving our lives again!!

This time, everyone has to spend that time alone.

There's not many naps (though there have been some).

There's a lot of reading.

And a lot of creativity happening. (though no music is allowed - because quiet, right?)

I believe my kids are getting along a lot better with each other, because they have some alone time every day.

They play better together when they are together because they are not together all the time. Ha!

I usually end up working during that time.

Or just enjoying the peace.

If you are just starting out, don't expect perfect results at first.

We did the work to get to this.

But, it is worth the effort to get something like this in place.

Life saving, I tell you!

Thanks Pam.

School Work

I want to write about COVID-19 school.

I have two in high school (10th,12th) and two in middle school (5th, 6th).

Our schools/teachers moved everything on-line rather quickly when they shut school down.

The middle school had packets to pick up for 2 weeks worth of work.

The high school teachers emailed students and sent links to work.

They offer ZOOM meetings for kids to join if they want to; but it's not required.

We had a scheduled spring break during this closure time and the teacher's aren't giving homework during that time.

It was very stressful at first.

I did not want my kids to fall behind.

But, even more stressful, was trying to keep up on everyone's work and making sure that it was getting done.


Sidenote:
I have homeschooled almost all of my kids at different points in their school life.

And it took a while to get the right mindset.

In regular school, there are grades and tests to show where kids are in the learning process.

With homeschooling, there is no one to compare my kids learning with except their own.

I had to figure out that my job was not to "keep up" where they should be, but rather help them develop the learning and skills necessary to succeed in life.

(By the way, COVID-19 school is nothing like homeschool!  No field trips!)


Anyway, it was stressful.

I was starting to feel like the cranky taskmaster that I try really hard not to be.

Thankfully, I remembered my homeschool mindset and it helped me not stress about school work anymore.

We did a family council and talked about all the classes and assignments that each child needed to focus on.

I put the control in their hands, not mine.

I asked them to be diligent and that  I was there to help them not push or pull them.

I asked them to think about what classes they would feel stressed about not being caught up when/if school started again.

And that they should make a schedule and do a little bit of their work every day; especially in Math, English, and Science.

Our schedule has school work between 9-11, with extra time built in after lunch and quiet time, as needed.

And it's working.

My older kids know what needs to be done and they are mostly getting stuff done on their own.

Having a week of no school assignments coming in has been helpful to realize that there's no rush to get things done.

Learning is happening.

I have kids being able to focus more time on things that they really enjoy and want to learn.

And most importantly, I'm not constantly nagging at kids to get their stuff done.

I don't know how long we will be doing school at home.

I'm not sure what it will look like when they go back to school.

Grades don't matter to me as much as learning does.

(Although, grades matter to getting scholarships to college and that is important!)

I want my kids to remember this time at home as different and challenging.

But not as suffocating.

For our family, that means Mom backing off and loving more than nagging.

I promise that some days are better than others.

I truly believe, as Gordon B. Hinckley used to say:

 "It will all work out."

Cluffs Like Food

We really like food in our family.

It's a bit of a running joke in our family to say, "Cluffs like food."

My husband has a family history book of the Cluff family from late 1800s and early 1900s.

Our family got a kick out of reading the descriptions of the different family reunions.

A lot of the descriptions were about the food served.

That's why all the food times on my schedule are marked in bold.

Eating is important to us.

It's in our blood.

Also, if I didn't put regular eating times into the schedule, I'm pretty sure that my kids would be grazing all day long!

There are not a lot of chances to feel in control of life right now.

Making a schedule of food gives me at least a sense of control in that area.

I even scheduled out each day's snacks and lunches for 2 weeks.

And, like all hard schedules that I write out, they end up being "guidelines".

My kids know what food is in the house and they get one type of snack per day at the appropriate time.

It makes my life easy.

And my kids get fed. 

And in case anyone is interested, here's our list of snacks and lunches:

Pretzels*
Granola bar
Fruit
Crackers*
Gogurt
Goldfish*
Nuts
Popcorn
Veggies/Hummus
Treat
Nachos
Sandwich
Pasta
Ramen
Pizza Quesadillas
Mini Pizzas
Mini Sandwiches
Leftovers

* they read the serving size on the labels to know how much they get.

The thing is, my kids are always hungry.

So, my favorite line to use is, "It takes 30 days to starve. Come talk to me after not eating for 29 days."

I guess it sounds kind of harsh.

I really love my kids.

And I love my sanity.

And, we really like food.

COVID-19 Schedule

I thought that I would post the schedule that is currently working for my family.

The ages of my kids are 18, 16, 12, 10.

I have always been a schedule person (see here).

5:30am-8:00am - Mom time (this is when I exercise, read scriptures, pray, get ready, etc)
8:00am - Breakfast
8:30am - Family scriptures
9:00am-11:00am - School work
          -Snack break-
More school
12:00pm - Exercise time
12:30pm - Lunch
1:00pm-2:30pm - Quiet Time
2:30pm - Zone cleaning
          -Snack break-
3:00pm-6:00pm - Project time/other school/free time
6:00pm - Dinner
They take turns picking a movie or show to watch every night after the kitchen/dinner is all cleaned up. As long as they got all of the necessary school work done.
9:00pm - Bedtime

It's working pretty good for us so far.

I'll post more about each block another time.

I'm trying to post a little bit more to record memories of this time.

Be Fruitful

In the Old Testament, there are several times when the Lord tells someone,

 "...be fruitful and multiply..."

I have always just equated this phrase to having a family. 

But, in the New Testament it says,

"...the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, long suffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,
Meekness, temperance."

Now, being fruitful to me means to seek for these things of the Spirit and spread them throughout the world.

Seek

The word I'm focusing on this year is Seek.

I want to make sure that I am seeking the Lord and His will at all times.

Lately, I've realized that God has always answered my prayers when I have been seeking something.

About 15 years ago, I realized there was a need for piano players in my ward. 

I decided I should relearn how to play.

I prayed and asked for help from the Lord.

And I practiced like crazy.

Yesterday, I played for the stake baptisms.

About 5 years ago, I really wanted to figure out how to become more involved in family history.

I prayed that the Lord would help me find a way.

And I started adding sources to my ancestors' records each morning from my phone.

This last week, there were 15 ordinances done for people I've been finding on family search.

 "Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you" Matt 7:7

I know the Lord hears my prayers and will give me answers if I ask.

I know that as I seek to serve others, the Lord will help me find the way.

I know that as I work hard (knock), the Lord opens the way for me. 

Summer Schedule

I've been a bit anxious about school ending.

I'm definitely tired of sending my kids out every morning and the rush/hassle it is.

But, I've been feeling a bit lost about what happens next.

This will be my 3rd summer that I am working part-time while my kids are home. And I'm still trying to get the hang of it.

I finally sat down the other night and got my plan figured out.  In case anyone is wondering why I do this, you can read this old post.

I'm sharing my schedule on this blog in hopes that others will join me - I've always thought, the more the merrier.

5:45 am - walking

7:15 am or so - check in at work

8:00 am - family scriptures

8:30 - 9:30am - breakfast/get ready/morning chores/personal scripture study

Play time!!!

1:30 pm - ? work

6:00 pm - dinner

7:00 pm - evening/kitchen chores

read out-loud book

9:00 pm - bedtime

Monday - Homeschool Day/Library

Temple Tuesday - (little kids watch a movie? or do a trade with another family?)

Friendsday Wednesday - play group/park day/etc.

Thursday - Shopping/One-on-one time/Kids Cleaning Day

Friday Funday - Field trip/Hiking

Saturday - Outdoor (work on house or play!!) 

I'm so lucky that I have the job I have. It is so flexible. 

Which I know I will have to be this summer.

I have grand ideas of what our summer will be like. 

But, even if it doesn't turn out just so, at least I have a foundation to work with.

Thoughts from the Women's Broadcast

I loved being able to go to the Women's Broadcast tonight with two of my daughters.

Even better was when we got home and started comparing notes.

Ginny (age 11) - I like how when we go to the women's conference its different than the regular conference in that we know exactly who they are talking to. We don't have to wonder who the talks are directed to, we know for sure that its for us. Some quotes that stood out: Hope will conquer despair; good will conquer evil; joy always comes after sorrow. And, "There's a great need to rally the women of the church to stand with the brethren to stem the tide of evil."  This really shows that the women of the church are totally equal to the men.

Maggie (age 16) - It really stood out to me how much they talked about how the Lord has His own timetable. It's not in our time, it's in His time.  And Sister Oscarson said, "Life rarely works out as planned."

Me (the mom) - There seemed to be a lot about standing up for what we believe in. Sister Stephens said, "If you strengthen a child you strengthen a family."  She also talked about how part of the plan is to be tested. But that it's not just to learn from our own challenges but we can learn as we support others in theirs.  And President Eyring really helped me realize that I cannot fix or even understand other people's sorrows or problems. Only God can really say, "I know how you feel." But, I can try and bring the Spirit with me and love others as I try to comfort them.

It's interesting that we all heard the same talks but different things stood out to each of us.

I think this is what is meant by "differences of administration"(D&C 46:15) in the scriptures.

Let's go to the Movies!

I love movies.

My husband loves them too.

I remember when we were first married going to two movies, in the theater, in one day.

And we love all types.

We watch romance, comedy, action, drama together.  

All of it.


One of my favorite things is to go to a matinee movie and come out when it is still light outside.  

It always gives me a thrill to walk out of the theater into the light.  

I think it has something to do with being so involved in a movie and coming out to the real world all lit up.  

"Oh yeah.  Real life."


I'm definitely not an expert when it comes to movies.  

I can't tell you the actors or the year it was made or what awards it won. 

And sometimes I can't even remember the plot that well.

I watch purely for enjoyment.


I'd like to think we're passing this on to our kids.  

We go on a date every Friday (at least we try to) and the kids take turns picking a movie to watch.

They love choosing movies from our local library or they pick something we have.

We've tried to introduce them to the classics like Davy Crockett, Herbie, Apple Dumpling Gang, Home Alone.  

And on Sundays they get musicals: White Christmas, Annie, Singing in the Rain, Annie Get Your Gun, etc.

Unfortunately, we can't show them too many movies from the 80's.  We've discovered that the language and innuendos are more intense than we remembered.


There have been sometimes, when the kids are on vacation, that we'll have a whole week of "Mom and Dad" movies. 

I think this might be one of those weeks.  

Saturday started with Support Your Local Sheriff.

Sunday was, Mr Blanding Builds His Dream House.

Thanks to our generous Aunt, we'll be going to Despicable Me 2 in the dollar theater tonight.

Any suggestions for the rest of Thanksgiving week?

In case anyone was wondering...

Working out to "30 Day Shred" only a few months after having a baby is completely different than working out to the same video 4 years after said baby.  Even though my workouts have been few and far between - it wasn't as hard as I remember.

I feel like I'm starting to come out of some kind of haze that I didn't really know I was in.  In some ways I feel like I had PTSD from all of the moving (3 times in 7 months).  But, now that I'm feeling settled I'm starting to regroup a bit.  And, I am no longer saving boxes.

I feel like writing more (see above).  Again.  I don't think I'll do the write every day like before, but I'm going to try and write more often.

I'm feeling the need to learn something new.  I think I might take voice lessons.

My family is growing up.  And I have to remind myself that I am at the peak of everything right now.  Peak laundry, peak eating (actually I think we've got room to grow here), peak grocery shopping, peak noise, etc.  My oldest will leave for college in less than 6 months.  I have a feeling that once she goes, time will speed up exponentially.

I'm currently on the "no treats" diet again.  Except this time, I'm allowing myself to eat treats on the holidays.  I want to enjoy all the pies I'm making for Thanksgiving. (Christmas lasts the entire month of December, right?)

Sometime, I'm going to post the list of all the crazy things that are said in my house.  Here's an example:  "Don't cut your ham with your elbow!"  We have a lot of those.

Also, I'm not posting this link to Facebook like I sometimes do.  I think that's the only time people read my blog and I don't feel like sharing so much this time.

Gospel Study in Our Home

I love getting ideas and details about how others study the gospel in their home.  There seems to be so many different choices in how to do it and its easy to get overwhelmed.  But I believe any good thing is good, and it's up to us to decide what works best in our own family.

Our gospel study has come along very slowly.  When my kids were very little, we used the Gospel Art Instruction kit.  We would look at a picture and learn the story.  We probably did this about once a week.  Then I would hang the picture up so we could be reminded about what we learned.

I also included "Read Scriptures" as one of our morning chores to be done before breakfast. The kids who couldn't read yet would bring me their book and I would have them repeat after me one scripture.  Once they could read on their own, they would choose how much to read.  (Although I tried to encourage them to not just open it up and read one verse of wherever they turned.)  I would suggest a column or a page or even a chapter, depending on their age.

I realized that they may not really be getting anything out of their reading but at least I hoped they were developing the habit.

My two oldest are now in seminary at school studying the New Testament.  They wake up on their own each morning at 6:00am and get ready and then read their scriptures.  They also use this time for working on their Personal Progress.

We have family scripture study at 7:00am.  We choose to sit around the kitchen table so people are less likely to lay down and read with their eyes closed. We have tried doing this at night, but it was much harder to get everyone together and quiet.  And even at this time, when my husband is sometimes already gone to work, we just do it without him. I think every family is different; the important thing for us is just consistency. (As a motivation to come to scripture study, if my kids miss it, they have to read whatever they missed, out loud to me before breakfast.)

We mostly just read the Book of Mormon about a chapter at a time.  We take turns reading around 3-4 verses out loud (depending on the length of the chapter).

We have tried reading other scriptures as a family, but we really need the blessings that are promised to us in this quote:

You will have the spirit of peace in your home I feel certain that if, in our homes, parents will read from the Book of Mormon prayerfully and regularly, both by themselves and with their children the spirit of that great book will come to permeate our homes and all who dwell therein. The spirit of reverence will increase, mutual respect and consideration for each other will grow. The spirit of contention will depart. Parents will counsel their children in greater love and wisdom. Children will be more responsive and submissive to that counsel. Righteousness will increase. Faith, hope, and charity -- the pure love of Christ -- will abound in our homes and lives, bringing in their wake peace, joy, and happiness.

Marion G. Romney,
Conference Report, April 1960, p.112 - p.113

And we definitely notice a difference when we read something other than the Book of Mormon.

We did take a few weeks recently, the last time we finished the Book of Mormon, to study Chapter 5 from Preach My Gospel.  I loved doing this because I actually felt like we were having discussions rather than just reading like usual.  In fact, sometimes I feel bad that we don't have more discussions, but I think it's kind of like going to church with young kids, it's not always about how much you're going to get out of it, but rather just developing the habit for later on.

Another thing we do is memorize scriptures.  I found this Charlotte Mason program to help memorize scriptures.  Mostly we work on the scriptures from seminary, but I add others in as needed.  We repeat our scriptures for the day before morning and evening family prayers.

For the current younger kids personal scripture study, I printed out these scripture prompts from the Book of Mormon reader.  We read the section in the reader and then talk about the question.  My 5 year old enjoys drawing pictures that go along with it.  But my 9 and 11 year old write their answers in a special scripture journal and then mark their regular scriptures as well.

For the kids still in primary, they can choose between this, or working in their Faith in God book.  (Although, my 11 year old has decided to read the Doctrine Covenants on his own.)  My 12 year old son works on his Duty to God during this time.  This is something I love about homeschooling, I don't feel like I have to rush past this to get them out the door.  We just have a set time where they work on it.

One thing that I have enjoyed doing in the past is our Sunday night conference talk.  Each child takes a turn choosing a talk from the most recent General Conference.  We either read it together or watch it on the computer.  This is actually a great time for discussion of principles.  And the kids are more invested in it when they are the one that picked it.

We also have Family Home Evening every Monday night.  Lately, these have mostly been about spending time together as a family.  Every once in a while, my husband or I will feel prompted that something in particular needs to be taught, but for the most part we just try and do something that will help unite us as a family.

I wish I could say that all of this happens every day perfectly.  It doesn't.  It's definitely a work in progress. And I'm sure that as our family changes and the world changes we'll have to adapt accordingly. 

What doesn't change is the Gospel. 

And my hope as a mother is to help my children learn it and love it as I do.

Being Rooted (for)

When I was a kid, every Monday night when we would gather as a family, one of us would have the job to tell a story about one of our ancestors.

We had a drawer full of personal histories to choose from.

There were several stories that got repeated over and over again and became our favorite. And even though we had never met these ancestors we felt like we knew them through these stories.

When we got older, our parents compiled a notebook with these stories, and a few others from our pioneer history, and gave them to each of us to use in our Family Home Evening.

We love doing this in my family and now my kids have their own favorite stories that they share over and over again.

My parents have continued to put together histories of different ancestors and give us copies through the years.

A few years before my Grandpa died, my Dad put together his Dad's personal history in a book format.  It was a huge work of love and he had it published. 

It was so fun to learn new things about my grandpa and I felt so much closer to him.

Having caught the "book publishing" bug, my Dad decided he wanted to put together all of our old family history stories into a book format. 

He and my Mom gathered all of the old stories we used as children and found some new ones.  They even put stories from our own family growing up.

Each of my children just got their own copy as well as a copy of their great-grandfather's book!


For Christmas one year my father-in-law gave us a journal from his side of the family. As I was reading through some of his family's history, I thought that some of the stories sounded very familiar.

I wondered if our ancestors knew each other.

Then sometime around our second or third year of marriage my husband and I were taking a family history class and we came across a line that didn't branch like the others.  We realized that we shared a common ancestor.  (I believe it is our 5th great-grandparents.  Which, I think means we are 5th cousins.)

One of the histories that my mom put together actually included stories of this common ancestor. 

I was so thankful that I had been given information about these ancestors so that I felt like I knew them.

In fact, I had this vision of them in heaven; my ancestors and my husbands, looking down on us and celebrating that their descendants had gotten together. It seemed as if all of their work/history was being combined into our family. 

What a powerful thing to feel that we have our own (not so) little cheering section up in heaven rooting for us to honor their name and continue the work that they started here.

My Thoughts on Homeschooling

Since we were job hunting at the beginning of the school year, I gave my kids the choice of starting school, and perhaps moving in the middle of it, or just being homeschooled. 

Secretly, I was hoping they would choose to stay home.

I have been wanting to homeschool my kids for a while.  I can't exactly say why.  We have, for the most part, had wonderful teachers and schools.  So it wasn't that. It's just really something I wanted to do.

The two oldest decided to go to the high school, but my 3rd, 5th, and 7th grader chose to stay home. 


I could not be happier about this decision!  I love it!

I love not having to rush my kids out of the door in the morning. 

I love not having to remember how long my kids read for and signing homework papers while trying to rush them out the door. 

I love that we don't have extra homework.  When we are done with school, we're really done. 

I love that we can be done with our school close to lunchtime.

I love that we can learn about interesting things all together instead of the kids learning separately. 

I love that I'm learning as well as my kids. 


And although I sometimes often long for that feeling of relief when I finally got them out the door.
 
And I miss having a bit more quiet time; and time to get chores and shopping done.

And the kids are together all the time so there's more chance of annoying each other and getting on each others nerves.

And there are many days when it's time to get started on school and there is a lot of whining. 
And screaming. 
And complaining. 
And fit throwing when they make mistakes.  

And I'm pretty sure that if they were in school most of that wouldn't happen. 

I wouldn't trade it.


I like knowing what my kids are learning and who they are hanging out with.  It makes me happy when they do play happily together, like right now.

I'm pretty sure there are not a lot of 12 1/2 year old boys who play make-believe like mine. 

I think it might have to do with what little outside influence he has on him.

Now, I know that I can't protect my kids from the world forever.  And I don't even feel like that's why I'm homeschooling. 

Except for the fact, that I'm their mother. 

And why not take as much time as I can teaching them what they need to know to survive in this world. 

Rather than leaving it up to others.  (As remarkable a job as they might do.)

And I'm not clueless to the fact that my kids will need other mentors in their lives.  I'm just not sure I want their mentors to be other kids at school who I may not know.


I'm still figuring this all out.

I have tried to be very structured like some books that I have read. 

But I'm starting to get more relaxed and realize how I want to do it.  And figuring out what works best for each of my kids.

My almost 5 year old is pretty sure she wants to go to regular school.  (Mostly so she can eat lunch there.)

My plan is to take each year and child individually and see what will be the best for them. 

But, the thought of not having to send another child to school again, makes me very happy.

Zookeeper

I am a zookeeper.

And I don't just mean that my house is a zoo.

Or looks like one.

Or smells like one. (I still remember my cousin's daughter looking into our car after a road trip and saying, "it smells like animals!")

I'm talking about my parenting style.

Have you heard about this book Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother by Amy Chua?

It's basically an explanation of a Chinese parenting method which produces successful tiger children.

Well, the other day on facebook a friend posted a link called Against Tiger Mothers.

It's the opposite view of the parenting method. He advances the idea of coyote parenting.

The idea being that tigers are the "specialists" and that coyotes are the "generalists" in our world.

I like both ideas.

Some of the children I raise will be tigers.

And some of them are definitely coyotes.

But, at least one of them might be a koala.

Sometimes it takes a while to see what animal they are.

That's my job as the zookeeper.

Figuring out what animal my child is and then following the appropriate "raising" technique.

Being a zookeeper is definitely not easy.

There are so many different kinds of animals.

In fact, in my zoo there are no two animals of the same kind.

But that's what makes a zoo great; the variety.


(And the variety is what makes it so loud, and messy, and smelly!)

Summer

You know those summers when you were a kid.

The ones that seemed to last forever.

Staying out late at night to play games.

Hanging out with friends.

Doing family things together.

Everyday is an adventure.


I'm having that kind of summer.

Be Your Own Cheerleader

Few things drive me crazier than when I hear a kid say, I'll never get it done!

Or, it's too hard.

Really, what is the point?


One of my favorite classes I took in college was a Stress Management Class.

And other than breaking a board "with my hand" for the final, probably the best part for me was when they taught about self-talk.

During that class I realized that all that grumbling inside is useless.

Since then I have become a true believer in saying positive things to myself.

It's the whole "little engine that could" moral.

I think I can, I thought I could, I knew I could.



Well, it's kind of morphed into a self-promoting attitude.

Good job on dinner!

Hey, I cleaned all the toilets today - hooray for me!

Do you guys know how awesome I am; I ran for 12 minutes without stopping this morning!


I tell my kids all the time - you have to be your own cheerleader because you can't wait around for other people to do it.

I mean, it's nice if others notice your hard work, but really, just plan on cheering for yourself.


I think it is starting to rub off on my kids.

Yea, I got all my homework done!

I'm awesome because I'm done with my jobs!

I rock!


This is the kind of stuff I love to hear.