Straight (jacket) Talk

I think I've blogged before about how the mind is a powerful thing. 

I've just been wondering if anyone else has a voice in their head as sarcastic as the one in mine. 

I guess you'd call it my conscious. 

I sometimes have these conversations with this voice in my head. 

Its obnoxious. 

Especially when I'm trying to have one of those "martyr" moments. 

You know the ones. 

The -  "Poor me."  "Why me?"  "This is the worst thing ever!"

You get the idea. 

Tonight, sarcastic inner voice came out pretty strong. 

(This is totally embarrassing, but I'll share it anyway.)

Martyr voice:  "Well, I guess it shows that I'm not the most important thing in his life."

Conscious voice:  "Well, at least YOU are the most important thing in your life right now."

Ouch.

Ok, got it.  Thank you very much.  I'll just go hang my head in shame and get my act together. 

Got to love people who will tell it to you straight.

Even if it is the voice in my head.

I have a habit of dispensing advice.

Sometimes (most of the time), the things I hear myself say end up being what I needed to hear.

Here are two gems I recently advised (myself).

1.  Instead of coveting other people's talents and saying: "I wish I could . . . like that person" you should say: "What am I already good at that I that I can do better to help others."

2.  Kids always need to feel special, but especially teenagers; because it's so easy for them to forget.

Good stuff.  I hope I can remember this.

Fitting In

Even though I may "live in the moment" there still have been times when I've moved that I've felt like I just didn't fit in.

In fact, one move I spent almost an entire year feeling that there was no one else around in just the same situation as me and therefore, I was all alone.

But here's the thing about fitting in: it's better not to think of it as a puzzle piece trying to fit into that one exact spot in the puzzle.

Think of it more like a piece of clothing that can really go with any outfit.

Or better yet, some kind of fruit to go into a fruit salad.

The fruit salad of life!

We already "fit in"; its just up to us to put ourselves in.

And most likely, we'll end up being that fruit that someone else has been waiting for to complete their salad.

So, what fruit are you?

Living in the Moment

I have a list of projects that I wanted to get done before we moved again.

I finally finished one.

I re-did my mission scrapbook, getting rid of all of the old magnetic pages and just pasting the pictures on white paper and protective sheets.

It brought back so many memories.

But, it also made me feel very sad.

I am the worst person for keeping in touch with others when I move.

I looked at pictures of people from my mission who I loved so much and meant so much to me. And I have hardly kept in touch with any of them.

How could I be such a loser?

But, then I had one of those defining moments.

I live in the moment.

I don't just survive where ever I go; I thrive.

I meet new people; I get involved; I don't look back.

This has been a great strength to have for all the moves our family has made.

To be able to quickly move on and make the most of wherever I happen to be planted at the time.

Unfortunately, that means that I start to lose touch with those who I have been so close to.

(Social networking has helped me do a bit better staying in contact with everyone I love.)

But I choose to look at this as a strength and continue to live in the moment.

I hope that everyone knows how much I care for them - right now.

In the past.

And forever.

The Hunted

(or please don't let me get the barfing sickness)


I sit and wait.

I know that it is coming for me.

I have watched as the others have gone down.

It started Saturday night.

Then spread to some of the stronger ones Monday.

And took the weakest that night.

But, by Tuesday, I thought that the danger had passed.

But, last night it struck again.

I have tried to hide.

But I have to help the others.

I can't just leave them alone.

Two more are done for today.

I am the sole survivor.

And so I wait.