Insufferable

I've been guilty lately of getting irritated with others whining and entitled-ness.

With people throwing pity parties for themselves and thinking the world is against them.

It's annoying.

Then last night I had the thought come to me, "they don't need to be judged, they need to be loved".

God speaks to me in short phrases that if I listen, I'm able to completely reverse my thinking. 

I believe another word for that reversal is repentance.

And charity suffereth long, and is kind, and envieth not, and is not puffed up, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil, and rejoiceth not in iniquity but rejoiceth in the truth, beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.     Moroni 7:45

I'm grateful for the charity that God and others show me when I'm insufferable.

On the Road to Emmaus

This is probably one of my favorite stories in the New Testament.

It's found in Luke 24.

Mary and other women had been to the sepulchre and saw that Christ was not there.

An angel testified to them that He was risen and told them to tell His disciples.

After being told of this miraculous event and not believing it, two of His disciples walked to a village.

And they talked while they walked; trying to figure everything out.

While they were talking, Jesus joined them.

But "their eyes were holden that they should not know him."

And He asked them to explain to Him what they were discussing and why they were sad.

They couldn't believe that He hadn't heard everything that had happened in Jerusalem recently.

So they explained to Him what they believed had happened and what they had hoped would happen.

His response was to teach them and expound scriptures to them.

As they came closer to the village (which was more than seven miles away) it seemed that Jesus was going to keep walking.

They still did not know who was walking with them but they "constrained him, saying Abide with us: for it is toward evening, and the day is far spent."

Can you imagine being taught by Jesus for that entire seven mile walk?

Of course, they wanted Him to abide with them.

But, it wasn't until after Jesus had broken bread with them that their eyes were opened and they knew Him.

What was their response?

They immediately went back to Jerusalem.

And they found the other disciples and "told what things were done in the way, and how he was known of them in breaking of bread."

There are times when my eyes are "holden" or restrained from seeing the Savior in my life.

Could it be that He wants me to talk to Him about what I know and what I'm hoping for?

Not being able to see Jesus doesn't mean that He isn't walking with me.

He is always there asking me what I'm worrying about or why I'm sad.

Asking me what I believe so He can teach me.

But, I have to take the time to hear Him.

So, if I study His words in the scriptures with a purpose, it becomes different than just reading the scriptures.

That is when my heart burns and I lose track of time and I want Him to abide with me.

I feel like I could "walk" forever if I were just able to keep that feeling with me.

The gospel word for that is endure.

But, how do I know Jesus?

When are my eyes opened so I can see Him.

On Sunday, I get to break bread with Jesus.

When I take the sacrament I promise to remember Him always.

And His promise is that I can have His Spirit with me always.

If I take the time to reflect on my weekly journey, I see Christ.

This is how I know Jesus.

I know that He died for me.

I know that He loves me.

I see Him.

And just like his disciples I want to share that with everyone.

Jesus Christ lives!

Desire

This week's scripture study has focused a lot on receiving revelation.

That is also something that our prophet has been pleading with us to do - Hear Him.

Today during scripture study the word desire stood out to me.

"And the Lord said unto me: John, my beloved, what desirest thou? for if you shall ask what you will, it shall be granted unto you." D&C 7:1

I have a strong testimony of that.

Way back in 2019, I wrote a blog post about this testimony, when my word for the year was Seek.

I shared then how the Lord has always blessed me when I have been seeking for a desire that included a way for me to serve others. (piano playing, family history, etc)

But, what about now?

What is it I desire?

In 2011, President Oaks gave a talk titled Desire.

He said:

 "Desires dictate our priorities, priorities shape our choices, and choices determine our actions. The desires we act on determine our changing, our achieving, and our becoming."

It seems like I have been going at this backwards.

My focus is more on my actions; just going through the motions.

What I need to do is think about my desires first to help me with my choices.

I have a new determination to figure out what it is I desire right now.

For now, this scripture expresses what I hope for:

"Behold, thou are Marla[Oliver], and I have spoken unto thee because of thy desires; therefore treasure up these words in thy heart. Be faithful and diligent in keeping the commandments of God, and I will encircle thee in the arms of my love." D&C 6:20

Cinnamon Rolls & Gratitude

I have an amazing cinnamon roll recipe given to me by my mom.

They are a favorite in our home and neighborhood.

But, I don't think anyone loves my cinnamon rolls as much as my oldest son.

He brags about them to all of his friends and is always so appreciative whenever I make them.

The other day, I made them for our first day of school "bus stop breakfast".

It was the first time I have made them since my son left on his mission.

I became pretty emotional thinking about him missing out.

But, even more, I realized how much I loved making cinnamon rolls for him.

I knew how much he loved them because he told me all the time.

Then I thought that this must be how my Heavenly Father feels when I show gratitude to Him for blessings He gives me.

It must bring Him so much joy to bless me with what He wants to give me.

I hope He knows how much I love Him and appreciate all of my wonderful blessings.

And I want all of my friends to know about Him, too!

Mom Time/Hear Him

So, I want to talk about the very first thing in my COVID-19 schedule.

When school was in, I had kids that needed to be at school by 7am.

That meant we had to have scriptures no later than 6:30 every morning.

I always set my alarm for 5:20am with the idea that I could read news and scriptures before getting everyone else up and ready.

It worked ok.


A couple of months ago, I decided to read and write down all of President Nelson's  invitations.

The idea was to pick one and work on it for a few months.

After re-reading all of his talks, I realized that more than anything I wanted to work harder on receiving personal revelation - really hearing God speak to me.

So, after getting kids off to school and exercising with friends, I made a stronger effort to take time to pray and listen to God.

I would get completely ready to go to work and then I would stop.

I'd shut my door and just pray.

I decided to carve out 30 min of my morning doing this.

Even though I didn't think I could really pray for that long, I did not want to feel rushed.


It became my most treasured time each day.

A time to slow down and express all of my feelings to my Father in Heaven.

And a time to feel His love for me and any direction I needed.


Fast forward now to kids being home ALL the time.

They don't need to be out the door early.

But, I've kept the habit of getting up early in the morning.

I still do my scripture reading and exercising and getting ready.

The kids know that we start doing breakfast at 8:00.

But, until then, I will be in my room for my alone time.

So, don't knock on my door!


It is still the best part of my day.

That time is exactly what I need to be able to face each day.

My patience has increased.

As well as my gratitude.

And when I follow any promptings that I receive, my day goes great.


When my kids were really little, and getting ready for church was a monumental effort, I learned that if I didn't get myself ready first, then it might not happen in time.

I still have that testimony.

If I don't take the time for the "needful" things as my very first priority, it's less likely to happen.


I know God wants to speak to me.

He loves me.

And I know He loves you.

Make time to Hear Him!

Every Night is Friday Night

COVID-19

It's what everyone is talking about and thinking about lately.

Our kids have been out of school this whole week and will be for the next 2 weeks.

It's been nice to not have to get up so early and get people out the door.

My husband commented the other night, that every night feels like Friday night.


Church has been suspended.

Well, going to the church building with others was suspended.

We are still doing church in our homes as a family.

And we have been given permission to administer and partake of the sacrament in our home.


Since every day feels like a Friday, I have really been looking forward to Sunday.

It will definitely feel like a different day than the rest of the week.

So today, Saturday, I made sure to prepare for honoring this special day.

I want my home to be able to feel and keep the Spirit from our worship.

In the Old Testament, the Lord spake unto Moses saying:

"Speak thou also unto the children of Israel, saying, Verily my sabbaths ye shall keep: for it is a sign between me and you throughout your generations; that ye may know that I am the Lord that doth sanctify you." Exodus 31:13

The Sabbath is the Lord's sign to me.

I look forward to being sanctified and listening to the Lord.

Broken Pieces

Here is my scripture thought this week from studying. 

This part in Acts kept reminding me of a talk I thought I had heard somewhere, but I couldn't find a reference anywhere. So, I made up my own.

Acts 27:43-44

43 But the centurion, willing to save Paul, kept them from their purpose; and commanded that they which could swim should cast themselves first into the sea, and get to land:
44 And the rest, some on boards, and some on broken pieces of the ship. And so it came to pass, that they escaped all asafe to land.

The Lord had promised that they all would live.

Some were strong enough to swim to shore.

But some had to use boards or broken pieces to make it.


I imagine using a board to get to land would not be as fast as swimming.

And I'm sure I would not feel in control of the situation.



There are sometimes, in life, when I feel strong enough to accomplish what is needed.

I can "swim and get to land".

But there are lots of other times when I feel that the only way I can make it is by clinging to broken pieces or boards; barely surviving.

I just have to hold on and hope I make it.


Either way, the Lord will fulfill His promises.

He will help me get "asafe to land".

I know He will.


Another thought:

Even if I'm a "broken piece", I can still help others around me.

This accomplishes the Lord's promises, too.

Seek

The word I'm focusing on this year is Seek.

I want to make sure that I am seeking the Lord and His will at all times.

Lately, I've realized that God has always answered my prayers when I have been seeking something.

About 15 years ago, I realized there was a need for piano players in my ward. 

I decided I should relearn how to play.

I prayed and asked for help from the Lord.

And I practiced like crazy.

Yesterday, I played for the stake baptisms.

About 5 years ago, I really wanted to figure out how to become more involved in family history.

I prayed that the Lord would help me find a way.

And I started adding sources to my ancestors' records each morning from my phone.

This last week, there were 15 ordinances done for people I've been finding on family search.

 "Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you" Matt 7:7

I know the Lord hears my prayers and will give me answers if I ask.

I know that as I seek to serve others, the Lord will help me find the way.

I know that as I work hard (knock), the Lord opens the way for me.