Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Thanksgiving Roles

No that is not a misspelling. I'm talking about the role that I always seem to fall into when I'm around family.

I'm the 4th in a family of six and I have always considered myself the middle child. My role, so it seems, was to be the 'funny' one. And therefore no one ever takes me seriously.

That seems so incongruous with my real life though. I mean I still like to think that I'm funny, but I think most people take me seriously now.

What I wonder is, is it my family that keeps me doing this when we all get together? or is it me not allowing them to see me any other way?

Of course, the next question is, are there ways that I'm expecting certain other siblings to act that's not allowing them to change and be different than they used to be?

We all grow up and mature and if we are lucky enough to move on from the past, we can make needed changes to our personality. But within the family, its harder to change. We pigeonhole each other into certain roles to play: funny one, serious one, baby, princess, etc. But I think that especially in a family we should be willing to allow for growth and change in each other.

My goal this thanksgiving is to be 'me' and let others be 'them' and see if we can't get past this roles thing.

3 comments:

  1. I think you and I have spoken about this before. I completely understand what you mean. I think some people in my family still see me as a little girl, not really taking me seriously. Other members in my family, however, have grown along with me and know me better as the person I am today. Yet I myself have to constantly remind myself to let go of old stereotypes and give people second chances. I think that is hard, though, because then you risk getting let down (again). I guess that's just love.

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  2. I have pretty much had the same role since I was little. It's okay, it has changed and grown into something bigger, as I guess it was bound to. But as the second child I am the one who likes to take care of things, and birthdays and stuff like that. I am more serious, and not as funny or as outgoing. But I think it's hard even as you grow older, we all are still carrying the same role around, it makes me wonder about the future, and about my child and future children.

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  3. The same thing happens in my family. I am the second child - responsible and organized. I suppose I am still those things, but I like to have fun too. When I'm with my family I often miss out on the fun to fall into the busy doer role.

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