Adopt-a-Highway

So, I was traveling down the highway the other day and saw that Quilted Bear had adopted a section of it.

My immediate thought was, "where are all the cute things?"

You know, like vinyl lettering on the guardrails? quilted road signs? etc.

If my highway looked like me. . . (instead of me looking like a highway) . . . I'd have some basketball hoops, kids artwork, book titles on the overpasses, candy bar wrappers everywhere, and more grass.

What would your highway look like?

Each Life That Touches Ours For Good

I have been thinking about friends lately. And how I have not been a very good friend.

You know how sometimes you just know that you're not doing what you're supposed to be doing, but you just go on not doing it anyway.

I've been that way for about the last 6 weeks.

And I realize that I've abandoned all of my friends in the process.

My friends could have helped me be a better person this last little while. And yet I turned away from them.

My friends make me feel good about myself. They let me talk. They encourage me. They ask the right questions. They say the right things. They believe in me. They remind me who I am.

But isn't it always true that when you are messing up your life, you don't want to be reminded by others that it's not who you really are?

Luckily, there are so many people in my life who love me and whom I consider "friends". I was reminded of this when a friend called just to see how I was doing. And another I ran into said they had been thinking about me all week. My friends never left. So where did I go?

I think I got swallowed.

"No waters can swallow the ship where lies The Master of ocean and earth and skies."

Life is hard. But when I keep God close to me, I don't get swallowed. He never leaves, but I often leave Him. And when I do turn back to Him, it is always a good thing. Sometimes hard, but always good.

It is the same with friends. It might be awkward to start being a friend again. There may be a few bumps. And I know that sometimes friendships change over time (and space). And different people will come into our lives at different times for different reasons.

But I realize how much I need friends to be the kind of person I want to be.

And I need God in my life, to become the person I want to be.

Warning: content not suitable for children

First, I've got to tell you about this great book series our family found. It's called "The Adventures of Ordinary Boy". He lives in a town where everyone has super-powers except for him. And everyone gets named after their super-powers (hence Ordinary Boy). But most of them have pretty lame powers. One of my favorite is Melonhead. His head is actually shaped like a watermelon, he spits seeds all the time, and he thinks he's the greatest thing in the world. And his best friend's name is Stench (no explanation needed hopefully). Anyway, on to my blog.

I decided that if I was to have a super hero name like from the book I would be: "Half-A#* Girl". (And no that would not have anything to do with the way I looked!!)

I just feel like I never really go full out for anything. I can start something and then it just kind of dies. I get all kinds of good ideas and then phllbbbttt . . . nothing ever happens. I do everything just half- a*#! (ok, I'll say way)

In the past I've set goals like:

Learn a new language (I know the words from the first semester of spanish - see here)
Do a triathlon (I bought a swimsuit)
Run a marathon (I ran a 5k)
Be a meteorologist (I have a weather gauge)
Lose 25 lbs (I lost 20)
Give up chocolate (I actually did this for a whole year, so I know I have it in me)
Learn to play the piano (again, since it was only half-a*# the first time)

Now my kids are starting to inherit their mother's super-powers and that is totally not acceptable.

My new years resolution is to do something all the way.

So I can change my super hero name.

Something more suitable for children.

Generous

So I am the daughter of an accountant. That probably doesn't really explain anything but I pretend that's the reason I am obsessed with money. Or rather with the control of it.

I wasn't always this way.

We used to not really have a lot of money and we just spent it as it came. That was until we had to pawn a wedding ring to pay for medicine because the next paycheck had not arrived yet (a story for another time). Since then I have been a budgeting queen. I have to know where all the money goes - down to the penny.

I thought I was doing pretty good. We were able to start saving and we had what we needed. Then we started making a little bit more money and I was able to spend on more than just needs.

It was nice.

But I didn't realize how much money controlled my life until it all went away. We had almost 3 months with no income.

Talk about an awakening.

But the awakening was not so much the lack of money; it was the freedom that I felt.

I had never realized how much money was suffocating me. Not having it was almost like being able to breathe again. I didn't have to worry about where my money was being spent or how I wanted to spend it, because there was none.

I told myself then, that I never wanted money to take over my life again.

Well, now we have some money again. Not as much as we used to, but some money. I have to be wise about how to spend it. But I am trying hard not to let it take over my life.

I realize that everything I've been given comes from God anyway. And being a good steward over my money does not mean being miserly.

The reason I have been thinking about this is because we are the recipients of the '12 days of Christmas'. It has been so exciting for the kids each night to hear a knock at the door and see what has been left for us.

It has been even more humbling for me to see how generous our "secret friends" are. It amazes me that they would spend so much money on us. So generous.

Now, I believe that I am a generous person . . . in some things. I give freely of my time and my talents. But when it comes to money, not so much. I have done the '12 days' for others before. I was not so generous.

I realize that being generous does not mean overdoing it (going into debt). But I do not want money to be the controlling factor in the decisions that I make in life. Its said that the "love of money is the root of all evil". I think that obsessing over it like I tend to is not far off that same path.

I am happy for the lessons that I am being taught now. Thank goodness that I have examples to help show me the right way.

Thank you secret friends.

Arrived

Does anyone else ever feel like they just haven't "arrived" yet.

I look around at my high school friends, college roommates, family, etc. and they all look like they have it completely together. They seem settled, happy. They seem to have a real life.

But then I look at my own life and wonder why am I so late doing everything? My life seems so far behind where everyone else is.

I guess it's a matter of expectations. What does "arrived" look like to me?

Unfortunately, I'm probably mostly thinking of material things. The nice house, the nice decor (not things taped to walls), a steady job, the right kind of toys, the money.

But I also know what really matters.

 Its the question: have I "arrived" spiritually? Am I where I should be now?

When I think about how much I have learned and grown in the past few years I definitely see improvement.

In some ways I will never really "arrive" spiritually because its the journey that counts.

And I can't do it on my own anyway.

Luckily, I have a lot of really good examples of people "arriving": high school friends, college roommates, family, etc.

Its always good for me to remember these things and know that I'm doing ok, even if it may not look that way with my own "material" eyes.

And to make sure that I look at others this way as well.

Because hopefully someday we will all "arrive" at the same place anyway.